Today I got off the plane and realized that here, here was where the board won't be lining up the holes in the swiss cheese diagram of the mishap. Here is where no one can call into question the decision to do on the flight, to practice non-standard CRM, to have a rushed brief, to enter a crowded airspace, to not confirm cards, to attempt to violate SOP. I never want to spend another hour in an airplane wishing I were back on the ground, never flying with the other again. Obviously it is now on me (and the other) to make sure it doesn't happen again. Some issues were acknowledged, some weren't...but mostly I don't want to end up a single spaced text file explaining all the stupid decisions on the part of the crew.
Leadership lesson relearned: if it makes the hair on the back of your neck stand up, you should probably tell the other...and then tell someone who can actually do something about it.
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